Permission to Change

Lessons of Light Issue #16

Apr 26, 2025

Who you are today may not be the you of tomorrow. And for growth-minded people like you and me, we hope for this.

To stay as the same person throughout the arc of our life is unsustainable and unoriginal.

So, why would we ask this of others?

Often we feel the pull to express, write, or create something, yet are so afraid of what others will think that we become paralyzed with fear and stuck in our own self-imposed jail. Letting ourselves be defined by outside forces will set us up for a life of regret.

I am not the person I was at 16 or 25 or 36 or even 42.

I am forever morphing and changing. This is essential to my identity as an ever evolving soul in a human body.

I want my children to feel this permission to change. To allow themselves to make a choice or to have a stance on a belief, with the knowledge that they can also change their mind at any point in the future.

I want to give them this grace. I want us to give this to each other, too.

I’m Over It

We’ve been in a time where people have been so afraid to say anything or do anything for fear of being cancelled.

Cancel culture: It is mob mentality. It asks us to conform in order to fit in. It asks us to conform, or else. It is deeply controlling.

It has become dangerous.

I’m over it.

How can we be expressive, creative people with our own unique essence if we are always trying to fit in according to what others say is okay? How can we learn, develop, and expand if we constantly stop ourselves before even beginning?

Not everything we’ve said or done in the past reflects the person we are today.

You’re Not for Everyone

I tell my children, “You’re not for everyone. Just like everyone is not for you.”

So, you might as well be you.

That’s liberation.

Can we actually embrace this idea as something positive, and not something that brings us to our knees? I know this can be really challenging for many of us people-pleasers. (Hi. 👋🏻)

Please, I feel like I need to say this – I am not condoning anyone or any organization that is harmful to people, animals, or our earth. Some people have lost their way, or maybe they never even found the way.

So, let’s just say that this is for you – the person reading this.

If we’re going to cancel anything, let’s cancel how we sabotage our own growth.

Permission to be you has entered the chat.

P.S. Where in your life do you feel like you want to give yourself permission to change?

A quick note to say that doors close this Tuesday for my course starting on Thursday, May 1st. You Should Totally Do It is an experience that is simple: It’s saying YES to you. We walk it together for 8 weeks with live calls and connection. As a subscriber to my Substack, you can get $100 off the course. Use the code: JOURNEY.

💡 Every night in Providence, Rhode Island, something sweet happens.
As the sun sets, local businesses, buildings, hotels, people, and cars flash their lights on and off at 8:30 PM.

It’s bedtime for the kids at Hasbro Children’s Hospital, and this is the city's way of saying “We’re with you” to the little ones. It’s called Good Night Lights. 💛

To me, this tradition is a lesson in what it means to be in community.

We often talk about personal growth, healing, and transformation as solo journeys, but we can’t discount the magic that happens when we come together.

We can’t discount what happens when we feel safe, seen, and supported.

As I work with people — especially in midlife — who are moving through life’s transitions, I see how transformation doesn’t only happen in isolation. It happens in the small moments of connection. In circles. In story-sharing. In spaces where someone says, “Me too,” or “I see you.”

To me, that’s what community is: A collective of shining lights. A signal that says, “You’re not alone.”

Your growth doesn’t have to be lonely. It can be witnessed. And somewhere, someone is holding the light for you, too.

🧢 Hold the Light has got you covered! (Well, at least your head.)

Guys! I’ve got some cute merch — check out these hats. I’ve got caps and beanies! I know, I need to put them on my website officially and get it all set up … but since I’m working on being in action and not waiting for things to be perfect, I’m getting out the word this way first.

You can order these hats by emailing me at: Laurie@holdthelightcollective.com letting me know what colors you want, how many, and your address —> and Venmo $ to the QR code below. (If Venmo asks, my 4-digits are: 5087.)

Hats are $30 each (including shipping)

Beanies are $25 each (including shipping)

I would love to see these hats on heads throughout the country (and world?!) spreading that message to hold the Light. Do we need it right now, or what?

Up next I’ve got some adorable totes coming, too. 💫

Well, for those of you who have been following on week by week on the podcast, this is the last episode on my series on The Freedom Transmissions. I’m curious — have you been listening? I would love to know who is out there listening to the season as I have been going this book, chapter by chapter. It has been so meaningful to me. I’ll still have a two-part interview coming up with Carissa Schumacher, and I didn’t plan it this way, but it worked out (Divine timing) that we are bookending this series in conversation together. I’ve learned so much about TFT, about myself, and about our world and humanity going through this book.

And so now, I’m feeling the inspiration to do a book club on TFT, which I will start sometime this summer. Carissa has given me the green light to create one. As she told me, she has given a few people permission to do work around The Freedom Transmissions, and in my conversation with her, she told me I was one who was given the official green light. (I think she had to fill out an official form with her publishers letting them know I have permission.)

Anyway, more to come on this. If you’re interested in joining a book club experience around TFT, comment below or email me at Laurie@holdthelightcollective.com.